A French Restoration

The French have an ingenious remedy for this. It is an electronic device loaded with a small charge. You dig this into the mole run, change the select button from 'securite' to 'arme' and cover it lightly with earth. The theory is that the mole comes along, tries to go round the obstruction, and emerges from the ground like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

The only trouble is it doesn't work. I got myself a case of 1664 and sat  hour after hour waiting for the explosion. After a week or so my options became clear. Either I could try a different sort of trap or become an alcoholic.In a 'tired and emotional' state I cursed the mole first in Anglo-Saxon and then in slurred French. It did the trick. The mole disappeared and there has been no sign of it since.